Have you ever given someone a second, a third, or even maybe a fourth chance? Have you ever had someone give up on you? Have you ever had someone walk out on you, or fight with you instead of fight for you? You have?
Then read on.
Today my partner and I found ourselves both free for lunch, something that doesn’t normally happen, so we took full advantage of this and went out on a little date. As we discussed the projects coming up and our busy schedules, the topic of conversation turned to all the people in our life who had decided to ‘give up on us.’
Now, for the tail end of last year, and the start of this year I have experienced a lot of loss. I lost my father unexpectedly, then I had a falling out with a close family member, and then I also ended my friendship with one of my close friends of almost a decade. Loss happens, but I found myself feeling this layering affect of grief that began to pile up both unwantedly and unexpectedly. My partner has also been going through something similar, and together we began relaying our feelings of all this loss. Then the thought of giving people a ‘second’ chance came up, and Kushal [my partner] then had this amazing analogy.
Have you seen Wreck-It-Ralph? Well for those of you who haven’t, it’s about the protagonist Wreck-It-Ralph who exists in his game primary as the villain, who destroys the town, and then there is Fix-It-Felix, who fixes Ralph’s damage. [See below: Ralph is on the left, Felix is on the right].
Now, in his own game Ralph can die thousands of times, but then he gets reborn, or brought back to life when someone puts in another dollar to play the game. However, when Ralph eventually goes through ‘the power cord’ and to ‘Game Central’ and jumps into another game, it is fabled that if you die in another game that you don’t game back to life. Makes sense right?
Well, we are all living with our own ‘one life’ and our ‘one chance’. We wake up every day and our life is our game, and if we die in our game, we die for good. For real, no take-backs, no second chances. No restart.
Life and loss is a lot like that. We are in this bizarre world, trying to make it on our own, and focus through the blur, the distraction and find our own path. Now people come and people go: yes, I get that. But my main point is what happens when it’s all: game over? Those who physically leave our presence, their game has ended. But what should happen to those who have emotionally left us: do they deserve a second chance to play in our game? If they have ‘given up’ on their one chance in our game, then why should we allow them to restart?
Loss, both from death and emotional relationships isn’t easy, but what I want to provoke is this: consider what you’re playing at before you declare ‘game over’. Consider all your options with those around you, and hold those close who help mend your pain and soothe your discomfort when your game gets tough, and you need a little bit of ‘heal’ or ‘mend’ on your journey of slaying the beasts, demons and dragons that exist in life. Realise that: perhaps once you’ve played out your journey with someone, [and died in their game] that there is no restart. Then, maybe once you understand this, you’ll realise how to Fix-It for yourself before your plug gets pulled.
* Creative Credit for this concept goes to my wonderful partner: Kushal.
* Credit Credit for image 1 goes to: https://www.pinterest.com/hannahtheveganz/i-m-gonna-wreck-it/.
* Creative image for image 2 (feature image( goes to: http://mspfanventures.com/?s=1426).
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